World Suicide Prevention Day : a memory

Posted: September 10, 2010 in Personal, Relationships
Tags: , ,

It’s another Day. Today, it’s World Suicide Prevention Day.

Nearly two years ago, one of my best friends was depressed. She used to call me virtually every night, talking about it all. She wanted someone not to condemn her for wanting to commit suicide. The rest of our friends were trying approach after approach to stop her. They tried guilt-tripping her, talking about the future, everything. Me, I told her that I’d miss her if she did, but I would never hate her for it, never blame her.

One night, she was particularly bad. And I couldn’t keep up that approach any longer, and I told her, ‘look, I have to say this. If you… did something, and I hadn’t said it, I wouldn’t be able to live with myself. I know you’re fed up with hearing it, and I’m sorry. But please, please, don’t do it.’

And she said, ‘Have you got anything else to say,’ a couple of times, and rang off. I have never been so scared in my life. Never. I sent her a text and waited up for a reply. I couldn’t call back – no credit, and anyway she never picked up ring-backs. Finally another friend sent me a text saying something about something she’d just said, and I breathed a sigh of relief.

She’s still around, and enjoying life now.

I’m not going to try to talk about wider events right now – I’m in the worst state of mind I’ve been in for about a year, and I can’t do it. You just get this story. That’s my three cents.

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